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Dec. 16th, 2010 at 1:37 PM
...I need you more and more, and the great world grows wider, and dear ones fewer and fewer, every day that you stay away--I miss my biggest heart; my own goes wandering round, and calls for Susie--Friends are too dear to sunder, Oh they are far too few, and how soon they will go away where you and I cannot find them, don't let us forget these things, for their remembrance now will save us many an anguish when it is too late to love them!
Susie, forgive me Darling, for every word I say--my heart is full of you, none other than you in my thoughts, yet when I seek to say you something not for the world, words fail me; If you were here, and Oh that you were, my Susie, we need not talk at all, our eyes would whisper for us, and your hand fast in mine, we would not ask for language--I try to bring you nearer, I chase the weeks away till they are quite departed, and fancy you have come, and I am on my way through the green lane to meet you, and my heart goes scampering so, that I have much ado to bring it back again, and learn it to be patient, till that dear Susie comes.
Three weeks--they cant last always, for surely they must go with their little brothers and sisters to their long home in the west!
Comments
"Open me carefully: Emily Dickinson's intimate letters to Susan Huntington Dickinson" edited by Ellen Louise Hart and Martha Nell Smith.
Here's another bit: "Susie--it is a little thing to say how lone it is--anyone can do it, but to wear the loneness next your heart for weeks, when you sleep, and when you wake, ever missing something, this , all cannot say, and it baffles me."