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med_cat: (Hourglass)
med_cat: (Hourglass)

"Grief is like a pile of rocks"

med_cat: (Hourglass)




“I was tired of well-meaning folks, telling me it was time I got over being heartbroke. When somebody tells you that, a little bell ought to ding in your mind. Some people don’t know grief from garlic grits. There’s some things a body ain’t meant to get over. No I’m not suggesting you wallow in sorrow, or let it drag on; no I am just saying it never really goes away. (A death in the family) is like having a pile of rocks dumped in your front yard. Every day you walk out and see them rocks. They’re sharp and ugly and heavy. You just learn to live around them the best way you can. Some people plant moss or ivy; some leave it be. Some folks take the rocks one by one, and build a wall.”

Michael Lee West

...
I'm not sure if the wall is to protect yourself, or to isolate yourself from the rest of the world, or to build something useful?...Comments, anyone?

Comments

Nov. 1st, 2015 10:53 am (UTC)
feels like isolation variant, but I'm not sure
med_cat: (Default)
Nov. 4th, 2015 01:13 am (UTC)
That was my thought as well, and yes, difficult to be certain
Nov. 1st, 2015 04:18 pm (UTC)
I took it as useful, but also the ambiguity is part of the message -- what's the wall for? Different people use their pain-wall for different things.

I'll try to make mine useful, not isolatory.
med_cat: (Default)
Nov. 4th, 2015 01:14 am (UTC)
Agreed :)
Nov. 1st, 2015 10:10 pm (UTC)
It does seem rather ambiguous. A wall can definitely refer to someone isolating themselves behind it - the classic "having walls". But - I suppose - it could also be taken to be a protective wall, behind which one can emotionally heal / recover.
med_cat: (Default)
Nov. 4th, 2015 01:14 am (UTC)
Yes, I think you're right
debriswoman: (apple)
Nov. 1st, 2015 11:11 pm (UTC)
Not sure...are you simply reshaping your grief, gradually, or retreating behind it?
Not even sure if the wall is behind you and part of the fabric of your home/life or in front as barrier...
med_cat: (Default)
Nov. 4th, 2015 01:15 am (UTC)
Something like that...and I think in front
Nov. 2nd, 2015 06:33 pm (UTC)
A fortress is useful.
med_cat: (Default)
Nov. 4th, 2015 01:15 am (UTC)
Depends on one's purpose, doesn't it? :)
Nov. 4th, 2015 04:51 am (UTC)
If it is not useful, it is not a fortress.
med_cat: (Default)
Nov. 4th, 2015 10:46 pm (UTC)
The point I was trying (and obviously failing) to make was, does one necessarily need a fortress?
Nov. 7th, 2015 03:30 am (UTC)
Not necessarily, but one cannot know that in advance. To need one and not have it would be bad, so it is useful to have in case it is needed.
med_cat: (Default)
Nov. 7th, 2015 09:31 pm (UTC)
I suppose so